A Guide to Anxiety – How to Deal With It

If you don’t remember any of the tactics I talk about today except for this one, that would be fine by me. Because this is the key to calming yourself down quickly and effectively. This should be your first instinct when you start to panic.
I’m sure you’ve heard many, many times from many, many different people to just “take deep breaths”. 
But let me tell you, it actually does help…a lot. Although, maybe not deep breathing in the way you think where you’re just…well, breathing.
Breath work is a breathing tactic using what are called ‘counts’ (a second or longer, depending on preference) to measure how long you are inhaling, exhaling, and even holding.
There are many different breathwork techniques, but my favorite and the one that in my opinion works the best is one called Boxed Breathing.
Boxed Breathing is a technique where you inhale for four counts, hold for four counts, exhale for four counts, and hold for four counts.
This not only helps me calm down, but it also helps me fall asleep which is a major bonus.

Why it works: Not only does this help by giving your mind something else to focus on because of the counting, but the slow rhythm of your breathing sends a message to your nervous system saying, “hey, everything’s okay. You can calm down now” which then activates your parasympathetic system (rest and digest state).

Tip: When you are inhaling, try not to inhale too much to the point where you feel it in your throat. You want to feel it in your chest and stomach. You don’t want it to be uncomfortable. This was what I always got wrong.

I know…you’ve heard this one a gazillion times. 
But seriously guys, doing a fifteen minute meditation twice or even once a day can substantially improve stress and anxiety. 
You don’t even have to do anything fancy or scour the internet to find a meditation script or recording.
All you have to do is sit down as still as possible, take deep breaths and maybe even count down from 10, 5, or 3. Your only goal is getting to a calm state of mind. 

Disclaimer: There is a difference between healthy, occasional, meditation and meditating 24/7 to get away from difficult emotions, problems, or this thing we call life. What can start as just daily meditation can turn into spiritual escapism. Don’t let yourself go there.

This one is another big one, guys. 
Journaling your thoughts may seem useless and even counter productive if those thoughts are…well, unproductive.
But let me tell you something. Not only does journaling validate your feelings and emotions because they’re out on paper, but journaling also helps you let go of those thoughts.
You see, your brain has a very high tech security system. Only the most important (or what seems like the most important) information and thoughts get through it. 
The problem is, if we have a ton of negative thoughts, our brain sees those as important. So it will store them and keep them there, circulating them around your mind so you don’t forget them. 
But when you put those thoughts down on paper your brain no longer has to worry about it because the thoughts are stored somewhere else. And then you can finally let those thoughts go.

I don’t know how many of you guys are Christians like I am (hi y’all), but I had to put this one in here because it is probably…no, it’s definitely the most important. 
In fact, it probably should’ve been first, but whatever.

Now when I say prayer I don’t want you to think of your usual script, your classic “dear heavenly father please bless”. No. I mean having a full on conversation with God like you would with a normal person. Like you would with someone you deeply care about. Starting with worship.
Again, when I say worship I don’t mean “you are a good, good father” okay? 
I’m saying pour your heart out. Say all the things God has done for you that you deeply feel grateful for.

It will feel forced at first. But I promise you that you will get into it and the tears will come and the words will flow and eventually you will find yourself having a full blown conversation with God. And not a one sided conversation either.
Not only will you not want to stop talking to him, but you will feel your anxiety fade as quickly as Dawn dish soap gets rid of grease. Because you will feel God’s presence and you will know he is with you and he will take care of you. 

This one’s a little difficult simply because if you live in an apartment or if you are like me and hate bugs then it’s a little hard to get yourself outside.
But trust me when I say this, if you can get yourself outside and your feet touching grass for at least an hour a day, you will see a difference in your mood, health, muscle pain, and more. 
Our bodies are like batteries. We need to recharge. And no, not just from sleep. 
I know this sounds crazy, but the earth has energy. And that energy is essential to decreasing inflammation, stress, and anxiety. 
Hundreds of years ago, we used to be in constant contact with the earth, but now we wear shoes made from synthetic materials almost 24/7.
And it’s not just the earth’s energy. It’s the stimulation you get from the cool feeling of the grass. The fresh air. The sound of birds singing. That alone helps.

This one is hard to work on, but trust me…IT HELPS.

Routine may sound boring and controlling, but having a routine–consistent meal times, bedtimes and even scheduled daily activities–gives us a sense of predictability and consistency. It brings us comfort because we know what’s going to happen next. We know when we’re going to get our next meal. We know when we’re finally going to be able to rest.
Of course for some people (I’m looking at you spontaneous brain types) that is a depressing thought. But for many people who struggle with anxiety, having a routine is very comforting. 
Not only that, but having consistent meals and bedtimes as well as waking up at a consistent time is actually really beneficial to our health.
Going to bed and waking up at a consistent time has been shown to regulate our arcadian rhythm, which means we will feel more rested and energized in the day time.
Eating consistently helps us to feel comfortable not eating as much at every meal because we know our next meal is coming soon. Therefore it decreases bloat and encourages weight loss (not that you need to lose weight, I’m just saying).
Of course this doesn’t work for everyone, but if you can, please try this tactic and see how it helps you if it helps you. Not all of these tips work for everyone. So that’s why trying them to see if they work for you is important. 

This one goes without saying. Love is the number one cure for literally anything. I believe that with all my heart. But it has to be pure, true, love.
So don’t be going to your “friends” that make you feel less of yourself or insecure. Go to someone (or multiple someones) that make you feel like yourself. The ones that make you feel like you can take on the world. And just spend time with them. Whether that may be talking, watching a movie, or watching memes….I mean, hey laughter is also the cure for anything.

We carry so much tension in our faces. To the point where when we receive a face massage, it doesn’t only melt away that tension, but it also melts away our fears…momentarily. 
Although we can’t always just immediately go to a spa anytime we’re having anxiety, it is great to have a facial massage once in a while. 
And it doesn’t even have to be from an actual spa. It can be from a loved one or even yourself.
As long as you can relax.

The five, four, three, two, one method is a common and well known method used for anxiety to bring your mind to the present. It is used by finding five things you can see, four things you can feel, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste.

For more info, go to my blog post 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 method.

I am a creative writer. I write lyrics, poetry, and stories. I remember when I was in the heat of all my anxiety, when my mind felt like it would explode, I would always pick up an instrument and start playing. And typically in about an hour I would have a song made…or half a song. 
Our minds are so full sometimes. And it’s hard to get everything out. I’ve always struggled with talking about my emotions and feelings (without laughing to deflect anyway) and it’s especially difficult when I feel like those feelings are invalid.
So instead of saying them, I sing them. Instead of talking about them, I write about them. 
You can do the same. 
And it doesn’t have to be writing like mine. Your creative outlet could be dance, drawing, painting, photography and/or videography, theater and improv, anything creative that you enjoy. You just have to find what your creative outlet is. 
Everyone has one. And if you can find it, you can use it to express and release your emotions and feelings. You can use it as–like the name suggests–an outlet. 

Music has the power to change our mood almost immediately. So next time you are having anxiety that you can’t seem to shake, just try listening to some cheerful music. 
Or even better, try playing an instrument (as long as it doesn’t stress you out more).

Now, I know there are some people out there that find music overstimulating and frankly anyone who’s already overwhelmed will probably find music overstimulating. And the thing is, calm music is no different than typical pop music when it comes to changing your mood.
In fact, it’s probably better.
If your goal is to calm down, listen to calm music. 
I recommend classical (depending on the song), ambient music (I like dark ambient), or meditation/spa music.
All of these are really nice options and I especially like to listen to them while doing another one of these tactics like journaling or even Yoga which we will get into a little later.

Self care is important in general and technically all of these tactics are self care if you do them, but there’s more to self care than meets the eye. You can learn more about it in my blog post, Self Care.

Yoga is known for its calming abilities and stretches. 
Although, the idea of doing Yoga can be kind of overwhelming and you’ll probably end up procrastinating it. 
I mean, it’s hard to get yourself out of bed and onto a yoga mat to follow a 15 minute guided yoga video.
But it doesn’t have to be this complicated. Heck, lots of Yoga stretches can be done in bed. And you don’t have to do that many.

Yoga stretches I suggest for anxiety are:

1. Butterfly Pose–Fold
2. Childs pose
3. Cat, cow
4. Downward dog (don’t push yourself too hard on this one or it will just be uncomfortable)
5. Upward facing dog

Now that we’ve covered all of the tactics, it’s time to get into the actual remedies that may help with anxiety.

Some great essential oils to try are:

1. Ylang Ylang (this one’s scent is pretty strong, so make sure to dilute)
2. Lavender
3. Roman chamomile

I like to make a blend with all three.

Some great teas are:

1. Butterfly pea–this one makes a really pretty blue color, although it doesn’t have much of a flavor so I would suggest mixing with another tea.
2. Boba tea or tapioca
3. Chamomile
4. Sleepy time tea blend

Another great thing to try is increasing your intake of GABA.
GABA is an amino acid that is in charge of calming your nerves. Foods like berries, tomatoes, potatoes, noni fruits, nuts, lentils, fermented foods, wild caught fish, and grass fed beef are all great foods for GABA intake. 

Magnesium is another thing that is important for not just your body in general, but your nervous system.
I usually pop some magnesium gummies in my mouth anytime I’m having anxiety or even when I’m having trouble sleeping.
I like the Qunol Magnesium Citrate Extra Strength Gummies. You can also try L–theanine intake. I have gummies for that as well. I use the XIAAN L-Theanine Gummies.